January 31, 2006

Ugly Americans

You ought go and read author Pamela Ribon's blog entry where she insulted Jollibee to a pulp. Well, what do you expect from Ugly Americans?!?! The way she talked about how terrible the spaghetti or the pearl shakes are speaks volume about our gastronomic culture and dignity as Filipinos. It's like saying how can we have the shame and dignity to eat these foods when Caucasian mongrels like Pam think of it as dung-hill craps. Not because I find her opinions far more important than ours, but because she thinks our food (uhh... hotdogs in our sweet spaghetti) is so anomalous that it ranks as one of the most least desired cuisine on earth.

Pam's quotable quotes:

Two girls with Texas educations that we were, my favorite part about our experience was when we wandered in pondering, "Where is Manila?" "I don't know, but they make awesome folders."

"This all tastes exactly like school cafeteria food."

When eating a yumburger:
Meanwhile, Ty was staring at her Yumburger. "This isn't something we can eat," she says. "There's a pink...sauce... and it's pink?"

"It's like Wendy's took all the goo that comes out of their burgers when they're done cooking them, pressed that down into a mold, froze it in a patty shape, and exported it to the Philippines, where they put it between some bread, put pink sauce on it and sent it back here."

The last straw, for me, was the banana langka pie. It doesn't taste like banana, nor pie. It tastes like burned pineapple butter on stale bread crust. With some kind of membrane in it.

For shame you ugly Americans!!

Tell how you love her article at the forum area where about 30 or more pages of pure scathing insults of unbridled vitriol are being hurled at the American author. Can't say she's James Frey though.

January 29, 2006

Ayoko Na!

My brain is currently in a fizz after another round of review. ahhhh.... boards.... coffee? nahhh... sleep? yeah yeah gimme some.... ahhhh.... ok page ano na ba? hmmm.... here... fizz fizz fizz.... zzzzzt.

January 13, 2006

Joke! Joke! Joke!

The following is a brief exchange between a reporter and the DeGaulles at a dinner honoring Gen. DeGaulle's retirement:

Dorothy Macmillan: "What are you looking forward to now?"

Madame DeGaulle: "A penis."

(stunned silence)

Gen. DeGaulle: "My dear, I think the English don't pronounce the word quite like that. It's not 'a penis' but 'appiness.'"