SAKSI!

Thanks to US-published manga artist Jennyson Rosero, this clip shows how NOT to do a field report. Funny as it is, it doesn't bode well for the state of journalistic professionalism here in the Philippines. Because GMA (and ABS-CBN) focuses more on human drama and sensationalism, it reaps the fruits of ill-researched and subjective field reporting. Nonetheless, enjoy.

Myleene Klass

This Fil-Brit sensation is the toast of the Classical world in 2005. Although she is more known for her gigs in the British pop arena, classically-trained Myleene Klass branched out into the more refined and rigid classical genre. Based in the UK, this Avril Lavigne lookalike has earned a cult following for her exotic Eurasian look and her virtuosity with classical piano. I think she has even grazed the pages of British FHM. If Maxim is the male version, Myleene is the female counterpart. She has recorded her first album, "Moving On" which has gone gold and was nominated for an award in the UK classical scene. I have yet to hear her Moving On album, but suffice to say that her MTV in Classic fM TV looks stunning. Why don't we have a classical channel here????

Be blown away with her classical MTV as she play Bach's Toccata & Fugue (a short variation actually):
http://www.myleeneklass.co.uk/
http://www.myleeneofficial.co.uk/


At least now, we can have another half-Pinoy to be proud of. Yihee!

On Cutting In

A couple of days ago, I went to Handyman to get my dog some cheap dogfood. (Yeah, I know- dogfood in Handyman!) Since it was about 5 kg. heavy and the pushcarts were there for use, I placed the load in and went straight to the counter. There were about two customers lining up and it was taking the cashier forever to scan the prices. She must have forgotten the seminar on how to scan barcoded goods. In about five minutes of "happily" waiting for her to finish, a middle-age grey-shirted woman tried to cut in in front of me. Just because I give ample space between my cart and the next person doesn't mean it's her cue to cut in front of me. What I did next will surely light the torches of Abanse Pinay! (this women's lib group): I pushed my cart forward, thus, preventing her from sneaking her fat butt in!

Hey, I don't think it's misogynistic to assert your rightful place, is it? I waited in line, so I felt I deserve to be entertained first. It is logical albeit selfish. If I was not selfish, who will then look after me? No one. And besides, giving space for others, though altruisitic it may be, will not earn you brownie points in heaven. You can't say to St. Peter, "Though I murdered my entire family and spawned dozens of bastards during my lifetime, I made sure I gave up my seat to every beautiful lady I encounter." St. Peter will surely say, "Sorry, acts of pakitang-tao are not considered acts of charity. Try again!"

If I had let that woman cut-in in front, what good does it do to me? I don't think a warm fuzzy feeling of being a willing accomplice in aiding an injustice would suffice. Will I get that girl's number? No. Will I get a simple "thank you?" No. (She didn't ask in the first place.) Well, if she did ask nicely, I'd be rude not to let her in. So, if doing such an act cannot benefit the doer, then why bother doing it? Besides, she's fit as a cow to wait a few minutes more.

I realized that this can blow into a vitriolic discussion between chivalry vs. equal rights. I can hear hapless ladies yell, "How dare you, you arrogant prick to prevent us from using our charms to get our way!" Hahaha! All I can say is: "first come, first serve- unless you're in an emergency." And besides, it would seem unfair also for the rest of the customers who are waiting patiently behind me. By cutting in, you're being inconsiderate to others' time and patience. By cutting in, you are being self-serving and selfish and I hope you rot in hell.

The only persons I will give up my seat/place in line:
1. Old people
2. The Disabled
3. Pregnant women
4. Mothers with hellspawn children
5. Ladies with heavy bags
6. My family and friends

As for the rest, I can strongly suggest to use those two legs that God has given them. Else, they can whack them off and ride on a wheelchair, then, they can have my place.

DIE Haloscan DIE!!

A year ago, Haloscan.com was a promising entity that provides bloggers with free management of one's comment's space. But I've realized that all those musings by vistors and friends were entirely erased at a certain time- I don't know why but I find it frustrating to see that the effort of those who passed by has disappeared.

An apology from them won't make up for all the words of encouragement and intelligent quips I have learned to enjoy reading throughout the past months. Don't they know that half the fun of blogging is to see people rattled in their seats that they are compelled to comment? I realized that perhaps its a bit of an ego trip, but hey, it's part of the ride. Because I don't choose or restrict my blog topics, nor tailor them to the prudency of the masses, my writings then are not pressured to conform. Thus, it's nice to read people dropping by like friends visiting a house while commenting on your latest diatribe. That's why it's infuriating for me and insulting on the part of the commentors that this has happened.

I needed to cut my losses hence I reverted back my comment page to good reliable Blogspot.
*Sigh. Life. And by the way Haloscan, if you are reading this, I curse your money-grubbing NASDAQ-delisted company and I hope your stupid main office be burned to the ground due to electrical causes. I curse your President, may he be killed by AIDS while having sex with his dog. I curse your staff and personnel, may they get pustular boils on their nipples, varicose veins on their noses and Grade III internal hemorrhoids for the rest of their miserable whiny whiny stupid drop-out American white-assed lives. DIE!!!

Muesli on the Beach

This Holy Week, the whole Manila dung heap population will undergo a mass exodus to the provinces. The only objective of this unholy affair is to soak up the sun, splash in the turquoise waves and to voluntarily get skin cancer. That is what the Holy Motherly Church has been trying to tell our melanocytes: Go forth and multiply! Exchange your Small Cell Lung cancer for Squamous cell carcinoma! So, instead of kneeling in front of marble saints and reflecting on the Gospel of Judas, the Da Vinci Code and the Passion of the Christ, Manileños all go to Boracay, Cebu, Hundred Islands, Baguio and Mindoro to have fun, booze and party. I'm not sure Good Friday at Friday's in Boracay means singing the Pasyon, but I'm sure the scene is similar to a bad taping of Temptation Island.

Speaking of Boracay which is the epitome of an expat-packed beach, I can't help but wonder how people stomach non-native foods at such a locale. The beach itself is isolated from any urban center and getting to the island is not easy save for the rinky-dinky airport to bring in the goods. Thus, having Foccacia with Balsamic Vinegar and Olive oil under a Bahay-kubo or eating Pecan & Walnut Muesli in your two-piece or speedos is not only paradoxical and anachronistic but also surreal. I'd expect native Filipino foods like Inasal, Sinugba, Halo-halo, Sinigang, Pork BBQ, etc at the beach, but unfortunately due to international demand, this is not so. Expatriate culinary expertise and coño Manileños with the grungy backpackers make such a supply-and-demand situation possible, and these people just lap it up! If it's a matter of economics, then there's no quib about it, but if you look at it from a cultural standpoint, it's quite insulting on our part.

Why?

1. Though experts imply that having international cuisine on Boracay is a showcase of the "love" foreigners have for the island or of the vibrancy of the place, the argument also suggests how these foreign carpetbaggers cannot assimilate to Filipino cuisine. This is different with a Pinoy expat serving adobo and pinakbet in his LA turo-turo house. With Pinoys, we cater our soulfood to fellow Kababayan because we know there's a sizable Filipino population within the vicinity, and such a business is logical. But have you seen a Boracay Brit or Greek serving Filipino cuisine in their establishments? No, they would rather serve haggis, bangers & mash, and gyros than our liempo or lumpia. And it's not even fusion cuisine. They cook it just the way they do it at home. For whom? For the handful of their expat compatriots? Yes; them and everyone else.

As for us Pinoys, we lap it up because having muesli for breakfast or penne arrabiata for dinner is as exotic as the island itself. You won't find it in your corner-street in Manila. I bet you'd rather have bulgogi than bulalo, or eggplant parmigiana than tortang talong anytime you're in Boracay- all because you're on vacation. V-a-c-a-t-i-o-n. And if I was there, I'd do it to. We don't feast on it in Manila, so finding it cheap in Boracay and at such array is a unique experience. You can have a French breakfast, Greek lunch and Korean dinner every night. For some, it's more unique to have a lassi drink than a mango shake. Truly, it's more of an "experience" than your usual Pinoy fare. But that's a case-to-case basis. I like Japanese cuisine, but I'd rather eat it in a Japanese restaurant in Manila than in a pseudo-Bali Hai open beach restaurant where the decors are from Kalibo and the wasabi flown in from Tokyo. But some will digress.

The pointless point here is this: Why dish out foreign cuisine when your ingredients cannot be sourced easily? Why do foreigners eat the same food they make at home, when the purpose of a vacation is to get away from it all? It's like a Filipino who went to Paris and ended up eating adobo and sinigang by the Seine. Why cook it for a population that's over two-thirds local tourists? Pasalamat na lang sila na sanay ang lasang Pinoy sa foreign dishes like bratwurst (mmm tastes like Swift hotdog), meusli (mmm tastes like pinipig), crepes (mmm tastes like lumpia wrapper), vichyssoise (mmm tastes like Knorr sopas), or sashimi (mmm tastes hilaw!)

2. Many tourists are not interested in our culinary culture. They try some native dishes for a night or sample the local drinks for the "experience", but after the novelty wears off, their tongue forces them to revert back to their home cuisine. That is why you'll see hordes of grungy unwashed backpackers wolfing down waffles during the day and Korean lemmings gorging on kimchi (a winter dish) in the middle of summer. Whatever makes them happy (and open their wallets) is fine by me. As long they're spending their budget on the local economy, expat and otherwise, it's as good as them eating our native dishes. I just hope our food is the main come-on, and not their home cuisine. If you compare this to Kho Phi Phi in Thailand, many of the restaurants there serve Thai cuisine with a few continental dishes interspered in their menu. It's a rarity to see an establishment there solely selling Greek, British or Korean cuisine. That's to show how respected their foods are, so much so that foreigners just shut up and eat Pad Thai rather than whine about the lack of Blueberry waffles. Here, we prostitute ourselves too much and everyone's oblivious to it.

Our restaurant is famous for its delicious food of original salads, succulent
paninis, oversized sandwiches, crusty pizza, creamy risotto, famous pastas,
day-fresh seafood and tender and tasty steaks. This season, our Chef is cooking some original food specials: Fresh Goose Liver (Foie Gras), Duck Breast (Magret de Canard), Ostrich Steak, Lamb Shank, Sea Bass and Chicken roulade.

-Blurb from Friday's Boracay Website

Ahhhh..... I rest my case. Oy waiter! I'll have some foie gras and champagne to go with my sinigang!

Personified

Personified*
by: Julsitos

He was light personified,
He was truth personified,
He was faith personified,
He was peace personified,
He was compassion personified,
He was forgiveness personified
He was suffering personified,
He was dignity personified,
He was love personified,
For Christ is love,
He is,
Thus,
Christ personified.

* A Tribute the 1st year Death Anniversary of Pope John Paul the Great.

Bibliositis

While my sister and mother always tell me that they feel the urge to defecate once they enter a bookstore, I on the other hand want to take up residence inside. One, bookstores are a veritable trove of literary treasures waiting to be rediscovered and most of these have bargain bins where you can find a rare gem. And for those who have the mongoose instinct of digging up things, looking under a mountain of discounted volumes is a strong motivation. However, some people's pleasurable obsession for hunting books can transform into what I'll call "Bibliositis."

Bibliositis is the inflammation of the satiety center in one's hypothalamus and symptoms are characterized by a sudden onset of manic euphoria, tachycardia (rising heatbeat), salivation and phalangeal tremors, all precipitated by the sight of bargain books and aggravated by more bins of discounted books. This is followed by book-induced nystagmus, the disappearance of any self-control, and loss of temporal consciousness. Depending on the susceptibility of the patient, the inflammation usually ends with gradual depression after paying for the books, and chest tightness if he/she sees that the book is a dud.

This psychosomatic disorder is prevalent among high-school and college graduates, more in females than in males, and seen among bloggers and pop culture reviewers. Personal history includes personal libraries in patient's homes. Family history includes other family members afflicted with Bibliositis.

Currently, there is no definitive cure for Bibliositis. Only constant observation and counselling are recommended at this stage. Electric shock therapy is presently being researched as a Bibliositic cure at the National Institure for Mental Health, but so far, test subjects have only shown to exhibit adverse reactions like coprolalia and dyslexia. The Philippine Medical Association is appealing to Book Sale and Powerbooks to put up warning signs on their shop's entrances and on their cashiers, but they have yet to receive the shop's formal response.

This lifestyle disease has struck several bloggers as of late like Jessica Zafra in her latest entry, blogsite of Gigi Goes Gaga, and even John Nery, an editor of Philippine Daily Inquirer.

The question is: Do you have Bibliositis??

Literary News:
1. Powerbooks is having a warehouse sale on March 16-April 1, 2006; 10am to 7pm at # 25 Brixton st. Capitol Subdivision, Pasig City. If you are coming from Shaw blvd., take a left turn to Reliance st. then turn right to Brixton st. (it's the street parallel left to Pioneer st.). there is a BIG Powerbooks signage at the gate. More bargain books, bigger discounts!

2. Find of the Year:



Penguin's "Red Classics" offers a fairly good range of old and modern classics at a reasonable price. While these are being sold in the UK at its original price, here in Manila you can avail of a copy at Powerbooks for 60% off the calculated price and 20% more if you buy it during weekend sales. If you'll compare them with other editions of the same title, more often than not you will be surprised at how expensive others are. For example, Penguin's "Bridge of San Luis Rey" costs only P220 ($4.40) on regular days and P180 ($3.60) during sales. That against Perennial Classics edition which costs more than P800 ($16), it's still a steal. But if you can find one under BookSale's jungle of used books, then so much the better.